Death by Chicken

Hamster: *ponders* Why do people call Bauhaus music?
Hamster: Is it that their sound influenced people because it does have that element of things we can take and make better? *philosophizes*
Mokie: They're goths. You've seen them dance. Does this not explain everything?
Hamster: I don't know if gothic dancing explains anything. It's awfully uninterpretive.
Hamster: *sees the point in the lack of it*
Mokie: Excellent question. *nodnod*
Hamster: *zens*
Mokie: *zen* *kelpy sway*

Death by Chicken II

Hamster: *politely trashes Bela Lugosi's Dead*
Mokie: *applauds*
Hamster: You're just happy because I've denied Bad Gothness, aren't you? :P

...

Mokie: Yes. You have passed the Gates of Bauhaus, a test that traps many a bad goth, and now you are ready...

I cannot describe the path that lay ahead of you, little goth, for lo, I skipped merrily through high on allergy pills and defiantly humming pop tunes, but it is a hard path, a long and twisted path, a path featuring often criminally heavy use of synthesizers... All I can do is offer you a piece of advice: laugh in the face of any obstacles, for joy scares them and sends them running for the shadows like the pallid little dipshits they are.

...

Hamster: Girl, you just asked me to laugh. And then you asked me to have joy. Are you on crack?
Mokie: Ah, and with that, the student has become the master. *gothzen*
Mokie: *mirthless kelpy wave*