Yup. There Goes All Chances of Me Ever Getting Laid.

"SAF seeks bishounnen. Must be good with blades. Secret history as cast-off angel of God or prior experience with highly demonic swords and vicious predatory animal alter-egos preferred but not necessary."

Now, out of all the billions of men on this planet, there must be someone like that out there, right? Right?

You. You who knows who you are, sharrup. :P